Love is in the air

It was a pretty good Valentine’s day.  Matt sent me a stuffed bear with a little stuffed puppy to me at school.  It was a nice surprise that was different from flowers.  He even signed the card “Love, Matt.” Of course we haven’t actually said the “L” word yet, so I wonder if he debated as I did how he should sign the card.  I had already written in his card the night before and decided to just go for it myself.  We didn’t get the chance to go out for dinner because he had to work late and I had band rehearsal last night.  I went over to his place after rehearsal so that I could give him his present – the mp3 player that I put music on.  I chose about an hours worth of music that pretty much summed up my feelings for him.  He had another gift for me when I got to his place.  He also gave me a hand made Scrabble tile bag with Marvin the Martian on it with new purple pro tiles inside.  Since he wasn’t feeling very well, we didn’t make out or anything, but we did go to Sonic and get some ice cream.  I dropped him off at his place and he said he would listen to the music in bed.  I came home and went to bed myself as it had been an exhausting day.  I woke up about 30 minutes ago and checked my email.  This is the message I got:

“Jennifer:

I listened to your music mix.  I’m not scared away.  You can trust your heart with me.  I’m yours.

Love,

Matt”

Wow.  I couldn’t have asked for a nicer response.  Sometimes I feel the need to pinch myself or something wondering if this relationship is simply real.  I wonder how I could be so lucky or deserving to find someone like him that seems to truly appreciate me.  Sure, I’ve heard people say things like “Your turn will come” or “When it’s right you’ll know.”  But I guess the cynic in me finds it difficult to fathom that I could actually find myself in a relationship with someone that is as sincere as Matt is.  I’m not saying he’s perfect, but he’s pretty close.  Have you noticed that in the few months that we’ve been dating, that I haven’t complained about him?  Since my blog is the place where I tend to vent, if I had something negative to say, I would have put it out here.  Now, I do admit that I was frustrated at his slow moving pace early on, but I think in the end it was better that we took our time. 

I think about past relationships and how there were always signs that I usually chose to ignore that were indicators that either my heart would be broken or that it simply wouldn’t work out.  It’s different with Matt.  Though I sometimes have the generic fear of “this is too good to be true”, I really feel like I can trust him with my heart.  I have bared just about everything to him and he still isn’t scared away.   So I’m jumping in.  I’ve gotten to the point where it would be painful to lose him.  That tells me that I’m feeling something far more than infatuation.  So I’m giving him my heart.  I think he’s worth the risk and I don’t think he’s going to break it. 

I’ve also decided to send him the link to my blog.  Since I don’t think he’s going anywhere, I feel it’s time he has the chance to read if he wants.  I don’t know if he will ever comment, but I’m sure he will at least read this post.  So everybody say “hi” to Matt. 

Here’s a picture of the bear & puppy he sent: