Friday, March 31, 2006
Yesterday Josh had a piano lesson. I think he's doing really well. After that I brought him home and then had choir rehearsal from 7-9. I still really enjoy taking part in singing some really beautiful music. I also picked up some clarinet music to play in showcase next week. I have to start practicing it. I did decide to take a personal day off on Thursday next week. Showcase is next Friday night. Josh is beside himself because he is going to miss it. He is leaving for a band trip next week.
And that's all the excitement going on here. I wish I had something interesting or profound to share, but life is pretty dull at the moment.
Wednesday, March 29, 2006
I finished the rosaries I made for my RCIA class and will take them tonight. That is something I've enjoyed doing. It is calming and relaxing to sit and string beads for a few hours. I now need to finish the 2nd baby blanket I am working on.
I just called the clarinet instructor at WT to check on playing in clarinet ensemble for Showcase again. I would only be able to make one rehearsal and then the practice before the show next Friday. I really do want to play in it again. I am thinking of taking a personal day next Thursday and just taking the day off. That way I could go to the ensemble rehearsal, do the Randall high school cheerleading tryouts (and make another few dollars), and then that evening will be my first confession at Church. I'm still a little nervous about it since I'm covering quite a few years. I really need to start making a list. I've been reading the Bible a lot lately. I made the decision to finally try and read the Bible all the way through. I read almost every night for about 30 minutes. I am now into Exodus and Moses just received the ten commandments. I have really enjoyed reading it. Many stories that were vaguely familiar are finally making sense. Though I admit I have had a hard time reading about Moses without picturing Charlton Heston.
Sunday, March 26, 2006
My team did well on Friday. We have 11 students qualified to go on to Regional competition. It was a long night though. I didn't get home until about 12:15. Luckily, I did sleep in on Saturday. I didn't get out of bed until 10:00.
Today I went to Church and sang in the choir. Then I finished making some rosaries. I need to tidy up a bit and do a little laundry. At least it's not overwhelming.
Here's the 4th paper of the persoal profile project:
I have many moments in the past 36 years that I find memorable. Some are happy while others are not. One of the most vivid is the time I was hit by a car and broke my neck. I also remember giving birth to my son on my 21st birthday. My engagement and wedding were also quite memorable. My mother’s memorial service was a difficult time but also something I will never forget. Meeting my high school boyfriend after fourteen years was also very interesting. To choose one moment to write about is a difficult task, but I will write about attending my first Catholic Mass.
Although I had attended mostly Baptist churches growing up I did attend Episcopal services from time to time. So when I went to my first Catholic Mass on Palm Sunday last year, it was not completely unfamiliar. It took me several months to even call someone at the church to get information about potentially joining. Once I did call, I received an invitation from a very nice lady and decided to take the plunge. It was a little unusual because at the time, the church was holding Mass in their reception hall. They were building a new church and so it was strange to not be in what I would call a normal place of worship. It was still very interesting, however. It involved a lot of sitting and standing, but we only kneeled once giving the circumstances of not being in regular pews, but rather folding chairs.
There was a lot of familiarity because of my experience of attending Episcopalian services that are very similar. I even knew a few of the responses. I did feel a little out of place since I didn’t know a lot of the recitations like the Nicene Creed, the Gloria and such. I also knew that I could not receive communion, but I did go up and get a blessing. Although I felt a little strange throughout the service, I did enjoy it very much. Although a Catholic Mass is very different than the services I was used to, it seemed to be very reverent and much more holy.
After the service was over, I went to breakfast with the lady who had invited me and we had a long conversation about my background. It turned out that I went to school with her daughter and I didn’t even know it. Since that service I have been attending mass regularly only missing a few times when I have been out of town. The more I went, the more I understood and after about six weeks I had all of the responses down. It seems that just by attending Mass, I slowly began to change and started to understand God’s will and knew it was just right. I never had one of those “Come to Jesus” moments, but it was more a soft nudging that led me to the realization that becoming Catholic was the good and right thing for me to do. I was not certain when I attended my first Mass, but after a few months I had no doubt about it. Sometimes I am amazed at how God chooses to work in our lives. I feel that I am truly blessed.
Friday, March 24, 2006
As I was laying in bed this morning pondering whether I should get out of bed I was thinking of that phrase "If you love someone, let them go. If they return to you, it was meant to be. If they don't, their love was never yours to begin with..." I don't know why that popped into my head, but I really think that phrase is baloney. (I would have said something else, but I am still cleaning up my language.) Why on earth do you let someone you love go? Why put them to that test? If you love someone and let them go, then they're going to eventually move on. And is there a time limit as to how long you should wait for them to come back? What if you let someone go, and then a few years later, you move on and get married and then the "supposed" love comes back? Do you then dump your current partner because the other one was meant to be? I think if you love someone, then you should hang on to them despite rough patches and through the low points. I think if you make it through, then perhaps it is meant to be. If you let go during those times, then perhaps it's not and that should be your cue to move on. If you love someone and let them go in hopes that they will come back, then you're a fool. I know sometimes things work out and people reunite with old loves and such, but I think that certainly isn't the norm and truly isn't worth the risk. O.k. that's end of my soap box this morning.
Thursday, March 23, 2006
Music soothes, inspires and evokes many special memories. I tend to associate different songs with certain people that have played a part in my life. Music can be relaxing or exciting and it is something that is always different and changes depending on my mood. I have a wide variety of tastes when it comes to music. I especially enjoy listening to classical music and my favorite composers are Mozart, Tchaikovsky, Rossini and Mussorgsky. I also am a fan of 80’s pop music. My favorite singers are Olivia Newton John and
Tuesday, March 21, 2006
I do not consider myself to be very active socially. I have a few people that I consider to be good, close friends. Unfortunately some of them now live fairly far away. I have several people that are friends but really would probably be considered more acquaintances. These are people I know and talk to them when I see them, but I don’t call them up or hang out with them. For the most part, I spend my time alone or with my son as I am usually too busy for other things. I do have several friends that are “online” friends that I have never met in person, but they are still special. I also do not date socially like I once did. I am still single and perhaps prince charming will find his way to my doorstep one of these days. I have just decided to stop looking for him. Right now life is usually filled with other things and I don’t have time sit around worrying about my social life. I am happy with the way things are for me.
Intellectually I consider myself to be very bright. I am by no means a genius, but others have said I am intelligent, including my students. I know that sometimes I may talk over their heads but hopefully they will learn some new words while in my class. I don’t think it is wise to dumb down too much. In high school I usually made A’s and B’s and I graduated 16th out of 332 students. I didn’t apply myself much in high school and most things came fairly easy for me. In college I made mostly A’s and a few B’s. I graduated with honors in college (Magna Cum Laude) with a 3.82 grade point average. My best subjects in school were band, speech, and English. I once had an I.Q. test administered and I was told it was 138. I figured that was pretty good.
Emotionally I tend to hold most things in. I can be and am very emotional at times, but I generally do not like to make a show of it. I especially do not like to watch sad movies with other people. When I finally watched The Passion of the Christ, I had to do it alone with a box of tissues. Some things that make me happy are riding rollercoasters, getting flowers, and sincere compliments. I would consider myself to be sentimental but not sappy. I tend to not show extreme emotions one way or the other and stay fairly controlled with my emotions.
Religion has become extremely important to me. For the past year, I have been attending Mass at
Economically I am probably considered to be middle class. I have been extremely poor, but never wealthy. When I was in college and a single parent, I lived on welfare for about four years as I finished my degree. When I began teaching in 1994 I got off welfare and started earning a regular paycheck. As a teacher, I don’t make a great deal of money but it’s enough to get by and have the necessities of life. It’s not always easy because my son is a teenager and he is getting very expensive. One of these days I would like to be free of debt and am working toward that goal.
Monday, March 20, 2006
I don't have anything really exciting to post today so I thought I'd start sharing my personal profile project. It's an assignment I am having my students complete and since I am asking them to share information with me, I figured I should be willing to disclose as well. (Don't worry, it's nothing that I would consider to be too personal.) I just did the same project... though mine is a bit wordy. They have to write a series of five papers about themselves. Here is the first one.
I was born on November 10, 1969 so I am currently 36 years old. I am 5’4” if I stand up straight in shoes. I have dark brown hair, hazel eyes and weigh 174 pounds on a good day. I have freckles, pale skin, and have been called “cute” on many occasions so perhaps I am starting to believe it. Most people consider me to be very smart and mostly serious, though I have been known to have fun once in a while. I was born in
I have a wide variety of tastes about many things. I developed a passion for rollercoasters a few years ago and have ridden about 125 different coasters. My favorite coaster is Poltergeist at Fiesta
I do have some things I do not like much as well. At the top of that list would have to be most vegetables. I grew up a fairly picky eater and I never learned to like my vegetables. I do like potatoes, corn and salad fixings. I hate any kind of bean. I am not a morning person and I don’t like getting up early without a good reason. I do not care for people that are dishonest and untrustworthy. A few other things that bother me are being broke, hypocrites, and scary movies.
I do not consider myself to be a very prejudiced person. I accept almost all people regardless of their race, religion, or beliefs. Even those that don’t agree with me in matters of my faith or belief system, I can still consider them to be a friend. I do find, however, that I tend to have a bias towards my faith. It is not so much that I feel that others are wrong in their beliefs, nor do I want to change anyone’s beliefs, I just have an affinity for Catholicism. My only prejudice that I feel I have would be against smokers. I do not have any kind of hatred for those that smoke, I will not, however, associate myself with them when they are smoking. I have had many friends that have smoked, but I choose not to expose myself to it when possible. The reason behind this is because my mother smoked for 42 years and passed away because of lung cancer. It was painful to watch her go through it and it is a horrible way to die.
I have a few talents that I have developed over the years. One of them is playing the clarinet. I have played it since 1981 when I was in the fifth grade. When I was in high school I usually sat in a high chair in all-region band, made it to area band several years and missed all-state by four chairs my senior year. When I was a sophomore, I made a first division and received an outstanding award at the state Solo & Ensemble contest. I started my college career majoring in music and though I switched to speech, I continued to play in band throughout college and still play from time to time. Another talent I have had is with flags. I was flag captain in both high school and college. I taught flags at band camp for many years and have worked with area school flag corps. I also consider myself talented when it comes to speaking and performing. Though I haven’t had many speaking opportunities, I did very well in my college speaking and performance classes. I have also participated in some local theatre productions and played a major role in the musical Into the Woods. A few other skills that I have honed in the past few years are writing, cooking, and my knowledge of computers especially with graphic design.
When it comes to personality, I can be very enigmatic. My moods can vary widely. On the positive side, I consider myself intelligent, witty, creative, resourceful, and easy going. I don’t let a lot of things get to me. My students concurred that I was intelligent but they also felt I was helpful, knowledgeable, and friendly. I was surprised that many of them did not think I was introverted because I usually think that I am. But just like most people, my personality shifts depending on the situation that I am in. I was also surprised that several said I was organized. I do like to be organized and I try, but I am not always successful at it. I tend to procrastinate a bit and can be a little lazy at times. My house is generally messy and I hate cleaning. I have been known to have very high expectations that can create problems for some people. I am very strong-willed and stubborn. But overall I would say that I’m generally a happy and positive person.
Sunday, March 19, 2006
I found that it is more difficult to burn a stack of papers than it seems. I forgot about fire really needing oxygen to burn. When it didn't burn like I thought it should, I took a few papers and wadded them up putting some on top and then a few below. That seemed to do the trick to get the fire going pretty well. I then helped it along with the fireplace poker. I watched them burn until nothing but ashes were left.
Luckily I was a little smarter than my ex-husband. (I'm sorry Richard, but I have to tell the story on here.) Shortly before he and I met, he sort of did the same thing. He did it more out of anger, however. He had a girlfriend that he found out was cheating on him. He broke it off with her and then proceeded to gather a lot of the things he had bought her and decided to get rid of them. He lived out in the country at the time and had a large pit where he would throw his trash. He threw the stuff in the pit and poured gasoline or something to help it burn. He then threw a match down there. Nothing happened. He did it again. Again, nothing happened. Of course he would walk away for fear of flames coming up, but again and again, he couldn't get it to light. He finally dropped another match and watched it go down. Turns out that the pit was quite deep and the match would blow out before it hit the bottom. So he got smart. He wrapped a stack of matches together, lit them and threw them down into the pit. He briefly remembers the fireball that shot out. When he came to, he was about 20 feet away on his back. He had no eyebrows left and the top of his hair was singed. He really was quiet lucky, albeit stupid. We met shortly after that. I didn't really notice the eyebrows (I guess they had started to grow back in), but his face was still a little red I guess because he made a point to tell me that he had been involved in a fire. I figured it had something to with his job being a police officer and it was until sometime later I heard the real story. But I guess the cleansing for him seemed to help.
Saturday, March 18, 2006
I'm really going to have to get a life where I don't post about my house cleaning and laundry. It would be nice if I could go on a date or something. My ex-husband just complimented me on some of my new pictures that I posted on my yahoo profile. I guess that's a good thing... makes me feel good that he still finds me attractive... just wish someone locally would as well. I still think I'm a pretty good catch, I just keep getting messages from weirdos though. Last one was a truck driver in Arkansas that couldn't spell. And I'm still talking to the other guy in San Antonio. He seems nice enough and he's Catholic... but he lives 500 miles away. I still haven't talked to him on my phone, but told him he could hear my voice on my blog.
And that's all the excitement in my world. No dates. No adventures. Just cleaning, chatting, watching t.v., napping, shopping, cleaning, laundry. But at least I'm not grading papers.
Friday, March 17, 2006
My purple bathroom. I love this color. Before I cleaned, there wasn't a clean space on the counter.
Living room... I even vacuumed the floors.
Living room - This is my desk where I spend most of my evenings on the computer.
My bedroom... unfortunately the animals take over my bed most of the time. And I still love my waterbed.
Kitchen - No comments on the color of the paint... unless you like it. I happen to love the color, but it's a bit bright for some people. It's better than the dark brown that used to be in there.
I still have laundry to finish and another room to clean. I am not even going to attempt to touch Josh's room. It looks like a tornado and an earthquake hit it. I'll save that task for a time when he is gone to band camp or something. I also have not worked on the garage in a while, but it's been cold here... so maybe this summer.
I do have to go out into the real world today and make a run to Amarillo. I have to buy reeds for Josh, and just do a little bit of extra shopping. I also need to go to the post office. I still have a package for Marty that I never sent him and if I don't send it soon, he'll be gone by the time it gets there. It's something I planned to send, oh... back in November I think. I was working on a lengthy letter to send with it, but decided there was no point to say what I wanted to say. I'll put a short note in there and let it be on it's way.
Thursday, March 16, 2006
No other news to share today. No interesting IM conversations. I still haven't left the house, but I did finally take a shower. I am going to perhaps go to Walmart today. How's that for excitement?
Wednesday, March 15, 2006
Is this the most boring blog post or what? I have nothing exciting to share except for my efforts of cleaning. Oh, I did also buy stamps online. That way I don't have to leave the house at all this week. Well, I do have to go to store sometime and buy paper towels and dishwashing tabs.
Let's see if we can find something more interesting to write about. I talked to some guy last night that commented on my converting to the Catholic Church and then proceeded to tell me that he wasn't Christian himself, but has his own kind of "religion". I guess he wanted me to comment on that fact, but I didn't really have anything to say about it. So what? I know lots of people that aren't "religious" or Christian, but it doesn't mean I have to tell them they are missing out or are wrong or anything of that sort. Religious affiliation is something personal for everyone and it's not my place to make a point about someone else's beliefs. I may not agree, but I am not going to make a big deal about something like that online with a stranger online. Somehow we started talking about the difference between agnostic and athiest and he somehow made the conclusion that all scientists are athiests. I am not sure what he was thinking. But the conversation ended quickly as he makes a "joke" about his sex life or lack thereof. You know at one time I probably would have just said lol or commented about it, but now it kind of bugs me. It's not that I haven't talked about sex with people online... but you have to understand that those were people I knew well and developed a friendship with and it's not something I do these days. It's not something that is in the forefront of my thoughts as it once was.
I still keep getting random IM's where some guy asks if I want to see him nude on his webcam. Is that all that is out there? I guess with the internet being so very accessible these days, it's filled with a bunch of perverts. That's one reason I stopped meeting people online. You never know who you're really talking to and people tend to be less than honest about themselves. The only exceptions for me would be in meeting some of my blogging friends. I would be o.k. with meeting people like Summer or Jonathon because I think after the time I've spent reading their blogs, exchanging emails and chatting that I have a pretty good idea the kind of people they are. And that's after a couple of years now.
I have another guy online that wants to call me. He lives in San Antonio and I chatted with him online sometime last year when I had joined a Catholic dating service. All of a sudden he has popped up again and started chatting with me. I am not sure why, but really, what's the point in calling? I am not going to get involved with someone that far away and once again, it's the whole online thing. Tell me, am I just too cynical these days?
Tuesday, March 14, 2006
I haven't accomplished much during my break so far. I haven't even really slept in. This morning I was wide awake by 7:30 although I didn't get out of bed until shortly after 8:00. I have done a little cleaning here and there, just nothing very deep yet. I mostly cleaned my desk area today in preparation for my laptop. I think I'm just going to take things slowly and hope by the end of the week I will have a clean house and laundry done.
Monday, March 13, 2006
My ex-husband wanted a recipe that I used to cook for him when we were married. I scanned it and sent it to him. My friend John told me that he bought his wife an ipod. And the other guy was rambling about something. I wasn't really paying that much attention. But as always, my popularity is short lived. I had to cut my conversation with Marty short and am certain it will probably be another two months before I hear from him again.
I went to the Cathedral in Amarillo for the ceremony and it was nice. The Bishop normally performs the rite, but he was out of town. We had another priest that did it and he made it very personal. He talked about everyone individually in his homily and then blessed each one of us individually as well. Only another month until I am confirmed. After the service I went to dinner with my sponsor. It was a pretty good day.
I have been working on an announcement to send to friends and family. I did some playing in photoshop. You can check out my works in progress if you're interested. I haven't decided which design I like or which verse I will use for the front.
Today I didn't really sleep in. I was awake shortly after 7:00 a.m., but made myself stay in bed and try to sleep in. I gave up shortly after 8:30. I should have made more progress today, but I spent most of it on the computer, though I did load and start the dishwasher. I do have plans to get a lot done this week, but I haven't done a lot today.
I am anxiously awaiting my new laptop. It should be here on Wednesday. I got my Microsoft software in the mail today so I'll be ready to go as soon as it gets here. And that's all the excitement in my world these days.
Saturday, March 11, 2006
I also hope to do more blog writing this week since I will have more time. I have seriously neglected my other blog and hope to update quite a bit. I also have not written Prison Pete in a long time and I am going to try to get a letter out to him. I still have a package I had intended on sending Marty at one point (like around Thanksgiving). I haven't heard from him in forever and heard that he had gallbladder surgery, but I did promise to send him some things and want to keep my word. That's a whole other blog in itself, but will save it for another time.
Wednesday, March 08, 2006
42% Intelligent, Helpful
35% Friendly, Knowledgeable
33% Organized (Ha! I have them fooled!)
31% Patient (Go ahead and laugh Richard)
25% Logical, Wise
23% Serious, Cheerful, Mature
19% Caring, Happy
17% Independent, Calm, Trustworthy
The rest of the words get in to multiple ties. I guess I am a little surprised that they see me as friendly, cheerful, and happy. It's not that I'm not those things, but I am surprised that it seems to be coming through more. But perhaps not. I do know the reasons why I have that appearance as of late and it's a good feeling. What surprises me is that my student's perception of myself is quite a bit different than my own perception. I have always considered myself introverted, shy, and complex. But I guess it all has to do with the roles we play in different situations.
But I also know that I have changed a great deal over the past year. In the past, I would have been quite surprised to find that others consider me to be patient. It has not been a strong suit for me. Now I do find myself with much more patience. Little things don't bother me like they used to. I am also not holding grudges... though I admit I still hold on to that little one regarding the boyfriend that dumped me the day after prom. But I have learned to let go of so many things that a huge weight has been lifted from my heart.
There are so many factors involved in these changes. Most I think are from my choice to get involved in church again. But other factors have played a part as well. My relationship with Marty, though a little on the painful side, helped me a great deal. Blogging has been therapeutic. Changing careers has had an impact by staying so busy that I don't have time to worry like I used to.
All in all, I enjoyed learning what my students think of me. It was quite refreshing.
Tuesday, March 07, 2006
I bought a laptop. I got my refund check last night so I went shopping online. I am getting a Dell Inspirion 6000. I think I got a pretty good deal. It has at 1.70 processor, 40 GB hard drive, 512 MB memory, ATI Mobility Radon 64MB video card, internal wireless card, CD/DVD burner (free upgrade), and 3 year warranty. I paid $885 with tax and shipping was free. I am also getting a free printer. Not sure what I'll do with it, but guess I can use it at school or something. The only thing I didn't get was Microsoft office, but if I order it separately, then I can get a better discount on it.
I have to take my dog to the vet this evening. He has an eye infection and a sore spot on his back. I guess it's a good thing I didn't spend too much money on a laptop.
That's all the updates for now. I gotta get back to work and have some lunch.
Sunday, March 05, 2006
I do have to say that being with the kids on the trip reminded me of some of the very good things about teaching. They are a really wonderful group of kids and they told the other teacher how glad that they have me as her replacement for next year. They gave us both cards thanking us for getting them to state and it was all very sweet. I think we'll have a good time next year and it's something that will keep me going for the rest of the year I think.
I'd have more to say, but I must get to bed. Hopefully I'll have a chance to blog more tomorrow.